Fast Forward.......04/12/2012

You know how people say alot can happen in the "blink of an eye" Well damn if thats not the crazy truth!! Since I last posted I am separated, been attacked by a dog, moved twice, Embraced single motherhood...again, developed some phenomenal friendships, Turned 40, Have been on High School auditions with a then 13 year old now have a rising 9th grader going to a Performing arts High school, and on and on and on.......

So Today I am am thoroughly perplexed.... When is Enough, Enough? Do any of you ever sit back and ask yourself that? I am just coming off 7 days with the tiny beasts, and we had an amazing time, real time, quality time.... Yes we were at the ocean, and yes it was amazing, BUT, we were together, all of us, sun up to sun down, in a condo a 1/4 size of our home and it was GREAT!! we talked, we spent time with one another, because we wanted to, we laughed, we were silly, we slept in , and yeah I know "Well Sarah ...It was vacation" But we got it "back to Good". So someone please tell me why do we choose to live on the Hamster wheel of life?? Why do I have my kids in "specialty schools" as of 3rd grade? why ?? Why do my kids have cell phones?? why is there a gaming system attached to each tv in our home?? why is there a tv in every room?? WHY WHY WHY??? What have I done? and if I revert do I damage them even more? I know times are different, I know its not 1985 , I know i overindulge out of guilt, but Damn, when does it end?

Well I will tell you when it ends..... NOW, I am going to make the changes I need to make to create the loving environment for my children to flourish..... How??? who the heck knows, but the youth of today are spoiled, overindulged, bratty, smarter than they need to be about things they really have no business knowing, and We are so busy as a society trying to "keep up with the Jones" that we have allowed our families to go to crap, who teaches Love ?? who teaches kindness? Sure we can  learn those foundations at Church and at home, but  if home consists of constant running,a single mom, slack ass dad, and "mid life crisis'" waiting to happen, when are we finding time to teach the basic foundation laying principles?

 I know its up to me, and I will get it back, in the midst of a 40 plus hour a week job, and single motherhood, a couple crazy ex husbands, and some really crazy tiny beasts......I will do it, and I can do it....Hell I want to do it!!! So watch me , learn from my failures, cheer me on toward my success and PLEASE tell me when there is something so obvious, yet I cant see it that could help me, They say it "takes a village" to raise a child, I want to be a part of that.