Hey Fellow parents, any of you dealing with grown children who are trying to figure life out? ( I mean we all are are to an extent) but seriously, Grown Children who think every idea is the best yet? I have a child who chose the road not traveled at all and is constantly frustrated and questioning why life is hard as hell?
As a Mom I want to fix things and in his life the situations are not ones that are fixable by anyone other than the said child. Well talk about defeat, talk about heartbreak, I don't want anyone to struggle, hell i do enough of that for our whole clan, but I am also teetering on how to proceed. I guess he wont ever fly on his own if i keep his wings clipped and try to smooth over every situation, but then there is the guilt, and the and the feelings of failure as a parent that creep in, those nasty enabling habits that are so hard to break, and ultimately have probably led him to where we are now, but this isn't a kid who ever made things easy for himself, he has always tested every situation to the brink of explosion for all involved, which has ultimately pushed people away. I am the last on standing, I can no longer help him financially, and shouldn't, but i worry to death over him not having a steady job, an apt.. of his own, a car, (since he sold the one that was bought for him last year) I know he is 22, I know he is fully capable, so what is the problem?
Bottom you say? He needs to hit bottom.... Oh he has hit bottom, yeah hes been there, Jail, Homeless, you name it, but with a little help got himself in a good position, and things were looking up until the next wild hair , and we are off and running again. I am not saying my kids need to be superstar success stories, but self sufficient would be Flipping Fantastic!!
I feel like my parents in the way that I relay things to him....." When I was you age I had you, worked 3 jobs and figured shit out!!! When I didnt pay my phone bill, guess what? Yup, NO PHONE, Lights ?? they needed to be paid to be on, I didnt love the Resort Town work that I did, but I sure as hell did it, Busted my ass in the busy season and saved for the slow seasons, Made a babysitting Co-Op so all us young moms could network and not get screwed without coverage, as 20 somethings we all worked our asses off.
What as a mom am I to do ? I am concerned, I am worried (dont laugh) I am saddened, that he isnt ever going to get it together, and that he will always feel as though there is always something better, never satisfied, Is that just how some people are? When do we as parents just step back and throw our hands in the air?
No comments:
Post a Comment